i think i am feeling unwell right now. fell asleep in the bus again until i reach the interchange and everybody alighted the bus. The bus uncle still have to call out "hello miss.." Oh man. that was embarrassing.

Today is an uneventful day for me. i feel so terrible from head to toe cos i am upset over my phy results and den my chem results which i couldn't get an A. i think i am putting so much pressure on myself when comes to study to get results that i'm satisfied with. next was the GP test which i am gonna flunk for sure. no doubt. and den following on was the Tug of war thing which make the few of us quite pissed with the house captain.

Den yesterdae the class kinda quarrelled becos of the teacher's day video and the atmosphere in the classroom was kinda tense. everybody is in a freaking foul mood yesterdae. This morning, the atmosphere in the classrm is a bit akward as well.. bud glad that everything is alright now..

*Oh man! warning! do not take photos when there are odd no. of ppl. You never noe wad will happen... especially during hungry ghost festival

A picture of 5 girls turn out with 9 ppl!! (apparently, 4 guys sneak behind us when the we are taking a pic tgt)

i have been blaming myself. for the results i have gotten. i realli wish to maintain my standard. bud how to? i could not find myself a condusive environment to study and couldn't force myself from watching tv and playing computers. I am lack of selfcontrol. too much of trust and freedom dad and mum have gaven me. They couldn't careless abt what i do or how i handle my hw. they just left me alone to decide my own future.

"No air-con too hot", "Arghhs let me finish watching TGA first", "my rm is so dirty, the tot of studying in my room makes me sick" All the bloody crap reasons i have come up with. i'm so feddup. i am going to the library to study alone though i noe it will be boring. tmr will be a day out at bugis. most prob just dinner. the rest of the time would be spent in the national library. I must do my best this time round. No more disappointment pls. the feeling of being disappointed is just undescribable.

recently, ay have been coming online to post msgs. dunno is it after the incident that she sees the need to come online more often to update fans herself or is she too free. i dun1 the 2nd 1 to happen haha. that means her role is kinda minor in tt 40 epi show. bud i was rather disappointed with her again. it seems like she have changed so much.. i dunno just the feeling and tone in which she types her msg and she speaks sounds so different from the her b4. and den the HIM mag. dunno whether i should be happy or wad. she looks nice in it bud still some prob that i dun wanna see in future like what happen to Michelle.

Seriously i realli feel like asking some celebrity how they feel. Do they actually regret their actions of joining the showbiz? Showbiz have indeed kinda changed them into a lousier person. somehow maybe its is always better that i won't see her again in real life, who noes another disappointment i will get from the meeting. Seriously the best impression is still the 1st time i ever met her. and now the only nice memories that i have is most prob the day i saw her at chinatown. So i wil not be so looking forward in seeing her in Oct. if she dun comes, so be it. let fate decide everything.

12:34 AM